Untitled
I was sitting in the dark, alone, in my room.. listening to the jazz music played on the radio. Suddenly I burst into tears.. I don't know how.. I don't know why.. it just happened.
Have you ever felt so alone even though you are surrounded by so many people? Have you ever felt so unhappy that nothing in this life seems to matter?
All I know is that I feel so lost. I don't know why I'm feeling all this confusing feeling that has been juggling up inside my heart and thoughts. I'm not supposed to be thinking about all this, its in the past and its over.
I was hurt so bad that I don't even know who I am anymore, don't know what to believe anymore. Still can't believe what had happened.. still can't believe that someone whom I trust with my heart would do such a thing.. and the hardest part was swearing at myself for still having all this feelings towards you when the right thing to do is hating you.
Despite all of that, I don't want to break down like I did before..
I wish I can just run away.. and escape my past.. But I know I can't..
So.. I'm just waiting.. waiting for life to turn around..
Have you ever felt so alone even though you are surrounded by so many people? Have you ever felt so unhappy that nothing in this life seems to matter?
All I know is that I feel so lost. I don't know why I'm feeling all this confusing feeling that has been juggling up inside my heart and thoughts. I'm not supposed to be thinking about all this, its in the past and its over.
I was hurt so bad that I don't even know who I am anymore, don't know what to believe anymore. Still can't believe what had happened.. still can't believe that someone whom I trust with my heart would do such a thing.. and the hardest part was swearing at myself for still having all this feelings towards you when the right thing to do is hating you.
Despite all of that, I don't want to break down like I did before..
I wish I can just run away.. and escape my past.. But I know I can't..
So.. I'm just waiting.. waiting for life to turn around..
12 Comments:
I understand how you feel I have been hurt in a similar way and I just wanted to escape and even did harmful things to myself to try and escape my past and I stayed so depressed , I wanted to die because I felt like nobody up in this world care about me and finally I had to tell the lord to help me and I would talk to him everyday and say lord if nobody in this world cares about me you do, everyday I said this and the lord god heard my plea and now I still am not perfect but he has saved my soul and I have peace within once again, take it to the lord and you will rest and have joy and peace like you have never known, except him and what he so freely wants to offer.may God bless and keep you and I will be lifting you up in my prayer that he touch your life in a wonderful and fulfilling way and you find your joy, this is my prayer for you in christ name ,amen
awwww... dont be sad kakak... hugs hugs... call me dong...
hate to recognize the feelings that you feel...but i know how hard it is...coz it's happening to me..
jez letting you know that you're not alone. but telling you that whatever had happened to you in the past, should never take your very own right to be happy. now or later. ^^.
cheer up dear...^^...
lah...lagi bersedih hati yah? Mungkin penyebabnya adalah:
1. Duduk sendirian di ruangan gelap (salah sendiri..mau aja sendirian gelap2an ih...;p)
2. Lagi denger lagu jazz yang sedih (makanya, dengerin sekali2 lagu METAL :D)
3. Ingat seseorang yang pernah nyakitin hati loe (upps..bukan gwe kan? ;) )
You can run, but you can never hide...
No more running, no more hiding, no more crying. What's the use of running, hiding, and crying? Just deal with the problems head on, like I did. Wait! What problems? There are no problems! They're in the past. It's over! Done! Finished! Don't dwell in the past. It ain't worth it. Just be careful next time. Cheer up!
be grateful of what you got right now, look around you, you had what most people can only dream of.... the world won't end unless you make it soo...
remember, always open your eyes and move forward. hope it would help.....^_^ cheers.....
PARTY!!! Stop making life sucks. It already is anyway. Try to bring more colours into it. So Get into it and Embrace it, Gal. I'm talking Gibrish as usual. LOL...
jiayou Syl...
from what i experienced, the happy feeling (or whatever feeling) dusn't only come from surroundings, but also comes within ourselves. jd intinya, it's u who control ur feeling...
jd jgn cedi yaaa..
I hate it when you feel like this and there's nothing I can do to make it better. But I can't say that I dont identify what you feel. Hey, shit happens. Life is like a wheel, sometimes you're above, sometimes your under. You're just hitting rock bottom but you won't stay there forever. Everything in your life is changing and you're just adjusting yourself, that's all. Don't waste your time thinking about the shitty ends of your life, you've still got plenty more memories to make so try to catch up with them and don't let them get away.
Hey you guys.. I've been working hard lately and never got the chance to check out the blog. When I did.. I was surprised by how many comments I got from everybody. Thanks a lot.. it really does put a smile on my face :))
tprecious: I don't know how you end up on my blog, but whoever you are thanks for the prayer although to be honest, I would like to keep my beliefs and relationship relationship with God a personal one. Thanks anyway.
Nin: *hugz* back... I'll call you for sure and we'll meet up okay?? lotsa of catching up to do.
Poppy: I know wat you mean.. but sometimes running away and denying the feelings hurts even more.. Its hard to accept that I'm feeling sad and that tears are building up but its harder to hold the tears in and deny all the feelings. I'm sure you know what I mean.
Boy: Mas Aviator mau nanya yah.. kok kenormalan situ ga pernah kumat ya? biasa tuh orang keisengan yang kumat.. kalo lo ga pernah ga iseng jadi pengen sekali2 liat lo tanpa keisengan.. coba deh kenormalannya sesekali dikluarin.. mo liat kaya apa .. :p
Fbuh: Hey you! Where have you been.. miss talking to you. Yes.. its in the past.. and hate to admit that the past will stick with me wherever I go.
Mr/Ms Anonymous: Thanks for visiting my blog and most of all thanks for the great wishes. I'm trying so hard to move forward but sometimes I just need to take a minute to look back at the journey that I've made. Hopefully in the end it makes everything clearer.
Io: hey mah maann!! hahaha.. party?? when?? where?? hehehe. Call me up sumtime.. and stop taking gibrish.. its such a turn-off.
B3a: hey be... glad to hear that everything's going well with you now.. ;) yeah it goes both ways.. and when one is not working.. sometimes breaking down is the only to go..
therry: Hey you girlfriend.. I'm sorry. I know I've let you down everytime I feel this way.. I guess I really did hit rock bottom and I'm just trying so hard to get up. Let the three of us make sum memories and erase the past bad black chapter of my book.. starting with the our valentine date and java jazz... Yippeee...
Ps: This is the longest comment post I've ever written.. :P
To sylvee....
listen to your friends.. the past will always be the same no matter how many times you looked at it...
remember, there are many people who wishes you and put hope on you, don't let them down and hey...cheers up... what more can happen... its time for fun don't you think....^_^ happy valentine's day
Mr. Anonymous
Turns out you're a Mr yah.. Well whoever you are.. thanks for the well wishes. Although I'd appreciate it if you'd tell me how did you end up in my blog or maybe know me?? Thanks a lot.. btw.. Valentine's still a long time.. :)
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