Adaptation

I have been home for a month now, and I have to say that its been a very 'confusing' month. Being home again felt nice, because you're surrounded by the poeople you love and care. Its the sort of feeling that says you're gonna be fine no matter what happen because you have them. But, I have to say, home was not much like a home this time around.

My house doesn't feel as comfortable, my bedroom doesn't feel as warm, the roads that I travel doesn't feel as safe.. as before. Maybe its just my adaptation period. At some point, I thought to myself, maybe I should go back and stayed in Australia instead. My eyes are somewhat open to the fact that Jakarta is an unsafe city to be in, the pollution, the recklessness, and the selfishness of the people who live in it. Those people who does not regards law as something important and thus chose to live and pretend that law didn't exist.

Most of all, the biggest change that I have to go through was the independence part. I feel as if I'm being ripped off my own independence. Its as if you have your legs and feet but u're unable to go anywhere.. just because your driver and car was unavailable at times when you need them. I miss being able to just leave the house and catch a safe public transport or walk at the side of the road whenever I feel the urge to sit in a cafe and chat with my friends. Without having to consider the traffic, or trying to manage the time so that it doesn't clash with the time when my driver have to pick up my sister from school, or my parents from the office.

And right now, I feel as though I have to choose between my family and friends.. or my independence.