Terrible first

Today was my first day driving off to work by myself (kedoya - kemang, lumayan banget loh..!!!) and guess what????? Gw NYASAR!! kemana?? ke RAGUNAN!! brapa kali?? 2 kalii!!! Mustiii banget ya nyasarnya ampe 2 kali.. dah gitu muternya jauuuuuuuh banget. All because I missed the tollway exit. I swear I almost cried while driving coz of the panic attack I'm having of not knowing where I freaking am. Usually it takes 45 minutes to work especially because the traffic was good since the school holiday, its supposed to take less then 45 minutes, but it took me freaking 1 and a half hour to get to work. I have to go through the same tollway 4 times, 2 for each direction, just to get to work. I was pretty nervous when I got Simprug coz seems to me all the motorcycles just wanted to hit my car or something. But when I got to Cilandak tollway, I thought to myself 'fiuhh, I'll be fine.. all I need to do now is to exit the tollway and turn to Ampera.' But I wasn't that lucky, I missed the freaking exit.

For those of you who knew me real well must've known that I'm not good in handling emergency situation and those scenarios described above was definitely one of them. Which is why I've been driving for a few years now but haven't really drove anywhere except places that are nearby my house. Which also explains why I don't know any directions or streets in Jakarta although I've lived in Jakarta since I was born. And to put the icing on the cake, I'm one of those people who are bad with directions. I have to go through the same road at least a zillion times before I know where I'm going.

However, I've noticed that my anxiety level increases for certain cases and it will be anything that are associated with electronics or car for that matter. I remember once, I was about to drive to Puri mall (nearest mall to my house), I put the key in to start the engine but it won't turn and I tried to move the steering wheel and it won't turn as well. So the steering wheel are locked and there I was panicking myself out, calling up people to help me out. Imagine the embarassment I had when I was finally being told that all I got to do is to turn the key while moving the steering wheel coz it was an automatic lock. F.y.i, I have the same reaction when something happen to computers too.

I used to dream of having my own car.. but now that I do, I wish I still have my driver taking me and picking me up from work. *sigh*

* My writings may seem meaningless and pointless, apologies coz it was written right after I got home. It was the blabbing and stressed me.